Tuesday, August 16, 2022

Kenya

How do I stop being a chronic worrier in life?

Q: Hello Auntie. I am a lady aged 28. My main problem is I worry too much that I start panicking. I applied for a job that is better than my current role and am so anxious about its outcome. I’m just wondering if I will get it. Sometimes I can’t sleep much at night. I am also in a relationship and I worry too much about my boyfriend. Sometimes am not sure if he is serious or not. This issue is giving me a lot of stress. Please help me overcome.

A: The first thing you should know is that the beauty of life is in its unpredictability– you never quite know what is around the corner! It is therefore very important to learn and embrace this uncertainty and thrive. You have been looking for a job, you applied for one; so be patient but learn to cope with the ambiguity of the outcome—whether good or bad. Who knows, it could bring exciting new opportunities you never even thought about.  Please make a habit of putting your heart and soul into the things you care about, and work hard on achieving your dreams. That is all you can do. The rest is up to the world. You seem to live in your own world, and you do not have friends to share your feelings with. Learning to talk about your worries will help you to get out of your head. It will also help you understand that there is no need to worry if the outcome is out of your hands, and hence you will offload some of the weight you carry around. Another powerful way of quitting worrying is doing something completely unrelated and different that forces you to focus on something else. This is most effective if you choose an activity that you get fully immersed in, such as practicing your hobby or reading an exceptional book. By and large, please know that you will be able to reduce your stress levels and boost your positive emotions if you are at least able to stop worrying about things you cannot control. 

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